When you start blowing up (basically ruining) your relationship with yourself (which, by the way, begins to affect all your relationships—intimate, personal, family, work, etc.), everything shifts. The moment we try to control, dominate, or change others—their behaviors, beliefs, or attitudes—we divert all our focus to things beyond our control. We become consumed with what we can’t change, and before we know it, we’re stuck. Stuck in the same exhausting cycles, getting frustrated because no matter how hard we try, we can’t change other people.

Meanwhile, we neglect our own needs and desires, losing sight of the one thing we do have control over—ourselves. Our attitudes, behaviors, and beliefs are within our power to shape. We have the ability to learn new, healthier ways that empower us and bring fulfillment. But that’s only possible if we stop giving our power away.

The key to getting what you truly want and need starts with reclaiming your power and shifting your attention back to yourself. Focus on what you can control, and watch how everything else begins to align.